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Friends Only


So, as an increased level of privacy, almost everything on this journal will be "Friends Only" from now on. About 95% of the people on my "friends" list on here I either:

a) Know in real life and talk to on a semi-regular basis.
b) Have some sorta private history with.
c) Don't mind them knowing all my personal shyte.

If this sounds like it could be you, comment, let me know IN DETAIL who you are, and I'll get back to you a.s.a.p.

Failing that, you can always add me on MySpace. That forum is way less private, and is all about the performance art side of my life.

Later, everyone!


"Your Flag Decal..."

While digesting Reader's Digest
In the back of a dirty book store,
A plastic flag, with gum on the back,
Fell out on the floor.
Well, I picked it up and I ran outside
Slapped it on my window shield,
And if I could see old Betsy Ross
I'd tell her how good I feel.

But your flag decal won't get you
Into Heaven any more.
They're already overcrowded
From your dirty little war.
Now Jesus don't like killin'
No matter what the reason's for,
And your flag decal won't get you
Into Heaven any more.

Well, I went to the bank this morning
And the cashier he said to me,
"If you join the Christmas club
We'll give you ten of them flags for free."
Well, I didn't mess around a bit
I took him up on what he said.
And I stuck them stickers all over my car
And one on my wife's forehead.

Repeat Chorus:

Well, I got my window shield so filled
With flags I couldn't see.
So, I ran the car upside a curb
And right into a tree.
By the time they got a doctor down
I was already dead.
And I'll never understand why the man
Standing in the Pearly Gates said...

"But your flag decal won't get you
Into Heaven any more.
We're already overcrowded
From your dirty little war.
Now Jesus don't like killin'
No matter what the reason's for,
And your flag decal won't get you
Into Heaven any more."

(lyrics by John Prine)

Ho Ho Ho

The Twelve Days of Christmas
for psychicbooty:
Day #Who?What they got you
1stkill_wait_diemost of a dead hooker
2ndunamericana fishnet body stocking
3rdkymdragona gigantic vagina in your yard, drawn in flaming gasoline
4thbgirlswinger20A genital piercing
5thraksha11A creepy sexual poem that they wrote in 2nd person narration
6thelgatolegatoA key to the playboy mansion
7thcruelint518A creepy sexual poem that they wrote in 2nd person narration
8throwainfirea gigantic penis in your yard, drawn in flaming gasoline
9thcowkittyA pornstar slot machine
10themafleea pop-up kama sutra
11thlight_iton_firea full-body condom
12thkarma5_0A pornstar slot machine
Take this Quiz at QuizUniverse.com
( or, take the 'clean' version at QuizGalaxy.com )

World AIDS Day - TODAY

Support World AIDS Day

The global HIV/AIDS epidemic has claimed over 20 million lives...

Almost 40 million people are estimated to be living with HIV/AIDS worldwide...

HIV is now the leading cause of death worldwide among 15 to 59 year olds...

Today, December 1st, is World AIDS Day.

Do something to stop the pandemic and change history:

1. Get to Know the Facts about HIV - Go to KnowHIVAIDS.org. Learn the basic information on how people can and can't get it, learn to protect yourself (and others), and talk to other people you know.

2. Watch one of these shows this weekend. Knowledge is power, after all.

3. Re-post this message in your LiveJournal/MySpace/Blog/Website etc. You can copy and paste the full HTML code by clicking here.

Rules For Being Human

1. YOU WILL RECEIVE A BODY. You may like it or hate it, but it will be yours for the entire period of this time around.

2. YOU WILL LEARN LESSONS. You are enrolled in a full-time informal school called Life. Each day in this school you will have the opportunity to learn lessons. You may like the lessons or think them irrelevant and stupid.

3. THERE ARE NO MISTAKES, ONLY LESSONS. Growth is a process of trial and error: Experimentation. The "failed" experiments are as much a part of the process as the experiment that ultimately "works."

4. A LESSON IS REPEATED UNTIL LEARNED. A lesson will be presented to you in various forms until you have learned it. When you have learned it, you can then go on to the next lesson.

5. LEARNING LESSONS DOES NOT END. There is no part of life that does not contain its lessons. If you are alive, there are lessons to be learned.

6. "THERE" IS NO BETTER THAN "HERE." When your "there" has become a "here," you will simply obtain another "there" that will again look better than "here."

7. OTHERS ARE MERELY MIRRORS OF YOU. You cannot love or hate something about another person unless it reflects something you love or hate about yourself.

8. WHAT YOU MAKE OF YOUR LIFE IS UP TO YOU. You have all the tools and resources you need. What you do with them is up to you. The choice is yours.

9. YOUR ANSWERS LIE INSIDE YOU. The answers to life's questions lie inside you. All you need to do is look, listen, and trust.


The High Fructose Corn Syrup Diaries

Have you ever been LIVID at someone, and yet know that whatever logical, detailed dissertation you could try to talk to them about would do absolutely no good... so all you end up wanting to do is just scream vowel sounds at them for like 5 minutes straight?

Ugh... I need to pee.


In other news, I think I have a crush.


"Sometimes I feel like a stranger.
Sometimes I tell lies.
Sometimes I act like a monkey.
Here comes the night."

- Laurie Anderson
Image hosted by Photobucket.com

That's right, y'all: Three Halloween showings this weekend!
Get your tickets now at EnjoyTheShow.com or at the theater's box office before we sell out!
We're celebrating 30 years of Rocky Horror and 4 great years performing at Universal Cineplex.

This is gonna be huge.

Wire Hangers

RottingAssmeats HAHA!
Chi Muffins:  We open with our narrator screwing up the Roman numeral system, making our hero laugh...
Chi Muffins:  Logan sits at his computer, obviously plotting his next attempt to rid the world of the conspiracy behind churros and the Cuban government, when suddenly...
Chi Muffins:  AND ANOTHER!
Chi Muffins:  How's it going, j00?
RottingAssmeats lol  It's grand.  Your IMs just made my day.
Chi Muffins:  Ho ho ho ho~
RottingAssmeats I might have to put this in my LJ
Chi Muffins:  That seems to happen a lot to me. .____________.

Veni, Vidi... Venti

So, after ordering a Tazo® Chai Tea Frappuccino® (Venti, with whipped cream, of course!), I found myself having this cathartic revelation:


Is this the end of pretension and irony?
Is post-modernism itself no longer post-modern enough?